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Sunday, October 29, 2006One of the lessons I learned with my first daughter is that no matter how pro-breastfeeding you are, you can NEVER make assumptions about a mom that you see pulling out a bottle for their kid in public. After all, I quickly became one of those moms. Nora nursed for three days...beyond that, she ALWAYS took a bottle.
However, that bottle ALWAYS had breastmilk in it. We never used any formula. To be honest with you, the little part of me that was mad about not being able to nurse was always kind of poised for a fight should someone ever comment to me about bottle feeding instead of breastfeeding. (Because you never know what's in that bottle...)
Now generally, I don't make judgement calls when I see people bottle feeding their babies. I may wonder if they choose to formula feed, if they didn't have support, if they had a medical condition, or what other things might have come into play, but I certainly don't think any less of them.
So this morning, I was sitting in the lobby at church in a comfy chair nursing Emmitt. Along came a dad with an adorable little 5 month old. He sat down in the chair across from me (never batted an eye about the nursing, good for him!) and started mixing up a bottle of formula for his little guy. My brain briefly went "hmm...wonder what the story is." As it turns out, it only took about five minutes for me to find out. :)
We got to talking and I asked how old his little boy was. "Let me think" he replied... "He's about 19 or 20 weeks old...I can't remember...we got him in June." The wording of that must have struck me as funny and he noticed a furrowed brow or something because he went on to explain that by "got him" he meant that he was their foster child and they got him the day after he was born. As it turns out, he and his wife had tried for 5 or 6 years to get pregnant but are infertile. They decided that they would go through the training to be a foster family and not long after, they got a call about this little boy.
As he put it, he got a call at work at 1:30 and they had the baby by 6pm that evening. That explained the bottle feeding. ;)
See...you just never know if that woman over there had a masectomy, if the baby is adopted, if she spent weeks in agony with cracked and bleeding nipples, or if she just never even thought about it to begin with. Promoting breastfeeding starts with approaching things positively, not negatively. That little boy went to them from a family that he didn't have a chance in...and they are giving him that chance.
Incidentally, it looks like they may end up being able to adopt him. He said they have their first hearing on Tuesday. Any Lactivist readers that are prayers might offer up a word of prayer for little Dominic at some point on Tuesday in the hopes that he may be able to stay with the parents that he's clearly come to love very much.
Labels: Life as a Mom